It's been a long time since I've posted anything. I have a three year old son now who is amazing! The reason I'm posting is that I've always looked at this blog as part of my therapy, a form of healing. I have been doing overall ok the last few years. I suffer from anxiety still but I can manage it well enough. But lately something has changed, I haven't been able to get a handle on her panic and anxiety. All of a sudden I'm having away nightmares again and I constantly have that feeling of panic and tension which I haven't felt this strongly in years. The only thing I figure is that I went back to study and was doing amazing there, I loved it but due to cutbacks the childcare was closed down suddenly and I can no longer continue my studies. It was very sudden and really unfair on everyone affected. Anyway I feel like the rug was pulled from under me and it seems to have kickstarted this reaction from me. At this stage I think the thing that started it seems to have passed but I'm still hanging on to the feelings and the panic is getting worse. It's very frustrating, I can't seem to switch it off!!
