Saturday, April 16, 2016

It's been a long time

It's been a long time since I've posted anything.  I have a three year old son now who is amazing! The reason I'm posting is that I've always looked at this blog as part of my therapy,  a form of healing.  I have been doing overall ok the last few years.  I suffer from anxiety still but I can manage it well enough. But lately something has changed,  I haven't been able to get a handle on her panic and anxiety.  All of a sudden I'm having away nightmares again and I constantly have that feeling of panic and tension which I haven't felt this strongly in years.  The only thing I figure is that I went back to study and was doing amazing there,  I loved it but due to cutbacks the childcare was closed down suddenly and I can no longer continue my studies.  It was very sudden and really unfair on everyone affected.  Anyway I feel like the rug was pulled from under me and it seems to have kickstarted this reaction from me.  At this stage I think the thing that started it seems to have passed but I'm still hanging on to the feelings and the panic is getting worse.  It's very frustrating,  I can't seem to switch it off!!