I found out yesterday that the DPP (in Ireland) have decided not to prosecute my rapist. The police here felt that there was a strong case and recommended that he be charged with rape and assault but the DPP decided not to prosecute him because there was alcohol involved and because there was a question of consent because I willingly left myself alone with him.
I think I'm still in shock, I don't understand it. They have it written in the legislation that alcohol can not be used as a reason or excuse but yet that's the main reason that the DPP gave. Because he was drunk and I was drunk then he gets away with it. I might have been drunk but I was in no way falling around the place, I had consumed alcohol but was in my full and right mind and so was he. I made it clear to him over and over again that I wanted him to stop and fought him for an hour before finally giving in, I had bruises and bite marks on my body which were documented and photo's were taken but still they won't prosecute him. He admitted having sex with me so how can they believe that the injuries I sustained were as a result of 'passion' as he called it.
This sends the message that well it's ok for you to rape someone as long as both people have drink taken. If you've drink taken you'll get away with it. That's the message we are sending, it's ok as long as your both drunk. You can do what you want with her then.
I don't understand it. He gets away with it and I am here in a crumbling mess.
I can only imagine how much this hurts.
ReplyDeleteI hope you understand that even though they aren't going to prosecute, it still wasn't your fault. I don't care how much you had to drink... he didn't have he right to touch you without your permission. What he did was wrong, and the blame is 100% his. I am so sorry for the lack of justice.
ReplyDeleteUnfortunately you are not alone. Stopping abuse like this will take all of us working together. It's time for Yes to mean Yes.
ReplyDeleteYour absolutely right Andrew
ReplyDeleteOh my God I'm so sorry! It made me so angry reading this!!!! It's so rare that the police actually do feel they have enough evidence to prosecute, so it's just disgusting of the prosecutor to decide not to take on the case! :(
ReplyDeleteThis must be horrible for you. I really hope you have some friends or family around you to support you through this!?
As Aerin said, this was absolutely not your fault! Having had alcohol (even if the person is completely drunk, imo) is not a good reason not to prosecute a case - and it certainly doesn't make it consensual sex. How will things ever change to make it easier to prosecute these cases, if they DON'T take on these cases?!!?